


Healing

by justafangirlingnerd



Category: Assassin's Creed - All Media Types
Genre: Alexios is Deimos (Assassin's Creed), Canonical Character Death, Character Death, F/M, Other, Post-Deimos, Slow Burn, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-23
Updated: 2019-11-27
Packaged: 2021-02-25 20:48:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,448
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21533302
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justafangirlingnerd/pseuds/justafangirlingnerd
Summary: Your friend Kassandra brings her little brother home
Relationships: Alexios (Assassin's Creed)/Reader, Deimos & Kassandra (Assassin's Creed), Deimos (Assassin’s Creed)/Reader, Kassandra (Assassin's Creed)/Reader
Comments: 5
Kudos: 46





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> The characters belong to Ubisoft! 
> 
> Don't read if you haven't finished the main story of Assassin's Creed: Odyssey since it contains spoilers.
> 
> This is the first fanfic I've written and also the first work I've ever posted. It's the very short beginning of a story I plan on writing, so nothing really happens yet. I just wanted to know if people were actually interested in reading this. Please let me know if you’d like to read more. Feedback would be much appreciated.
> 
> English is not my mother tongue, so I apologise for any grammar or spelling mistakes! This is the first time I'm writing in English, so please take it easy on me :D

It's been a long day on deck of the Adrestia, waiting for your commander, Kassandra, to come back from her visit in Sparta. You knew she had just allowed herself to hope for a future living there in peace, settling down and finally feeling home, just for her dreams to be destroyed... again. By the cult. The Cult of Kosmos.

The anger you felt thinking about the cultist scum was almost too much to handle. They were the reason why Kassandra had to leave Sparta when she was a child after being thrown off the cliff she had planned on visiting today. They had made it painful for her to think about Sparta, her home.

Brasidas had changed this. Brasidas had made Kassandra proud to be Spartan for the first time in years, you could tell. Brasidas. The Spartan general who had become Kassandra's best friend. The one who made Sparta feel like home again. Now he was dead and though Kassandra and her mother had just gotten their house back, you knew she wouldn't be able to settle down in Sparta any more. The Cult had made living in and even thinking of Sparta painful again.

You sighed. Kassandra didn't deserve this. All you had known about her back then on Kephalonia was that she was a mercenary and you were kind of afraid of her. She was intimidating with her eagle and the broken spear. But since she had taken you with her on her journey you learned how much of a caring person she was. She was not just a mercenary, she was so much more than that. You really hoped she could find whatever she was looking for when she decided to go to Mount Taygetos, the mountain that she was thrown off after she tried to save her baby brother: Alexios, who was thrown off that cliff just before she was. Her brother, who – just like Kassandra – somehow survived that day. But if Kassandra's life following what happened in Sparta was hard, Alexios' was even harder, you reminded yourself. You knew how much Kassandra still wanted to save him from the Cult, even though he had killed Brasidas during the battle of Amphipolis. Because it wasn't Alexios who killed him. It was Deimos, the weapon the Cult had made Alexios into by torturing him his whole life, even as a baby. Thinking about what you had found out about Chrysis, the cultist who had claimed to be Alexios' mother, and the terrible things she did to him in the name of making him strong made your heard ache. Kassandra still hoped that deep inside of Deimos Alexios was still there, that he could be saved. And you hoped so, too. You had just seen Alexios a few times in battle and when he killed Perikles; all very terrifying experiences, but Kassandra deserved to get her little brother back. She had lost everything trying to save him when they were children and you knew she didn't want to – as she said - fail again.

But it was unsure if he was still alive after that arrow struck him. When Kassandra started chasing Kleon for what he had done, she darted a glance at you telling you with no words to try to save Alexios, but the battle hadn't come to an end yet and you needed to take care of yourself first, which you knew Kassandra would understand. You really tried to reach him, but he was already carried away by some Athenian cultists before you could. So maybe he was still alive. As you had known, Kassandra didn't reproach you, she knew how difficult to follow her command had been. She was so understanding, you couldn't hope for a better commander, a better friend.

At least you were able to recover Brasidas' body, so you could take him back to Sparta, to his home. Barnabas and some crew members helped Kassandra bring his body there. The others went to some tavern to eat, but you were too nervous to do so. You wanted to wait for Kassandra and be there for her. You couldn't leave the Adrestia before you knew how she was and if she needed something.

So you sat on the edge of the deck all alone swinging your legs and watching the sea, when you heard steps coming closer. Kassandra? But this was not only one person. You turned around curious to see who was approaching the Adrestia. Your curiosity then changed to shock. You took your time standing up, trying to hide how shocked you were and to put on a confused, but – as you hoped – friendly face.

“H-Hello”, you said not knowing who to look at. There were three people standing in front of you. Kassandra and her mother, Myrrine, which didn't surprise you, but one step behind, nervous and insecure, was Alexios. Nervous? That was a state you didn't think you would ever see him in. 

“Y/N, I'm sure you remember my brother, Alexios? Alexios, this is Y/N, my right hand and good friend”, Kassandra said, she seemed to be exhausted, but happy. Alexios, who had looked at his feet, raised his head when he heard the name his parents gave him, a name he surely needed to get used to. “Yes. Yes, of course”, you stuttered smiling widely hoping to make him feel welcome “Nice to officially meet you.” Alexios' eyes now met yours. You weren't prepared for how deeply this first honest eye contact touched you. You could see he had cried. The barrier that Deimos had built to stop people from seeing his pain and his real self, Alexios, has fallen. “Hello.” His voice was quiet. It was surreal. You didn't know what to think, you were overwhelmed with conflicting feelings. You were happy for Kassandra, but also worried. She had gone through a lot lately, lost so many loved ones because of the Cult. Some of them even died at Alexios' hands. Could you really trust him?

You knew that Kassandra and her family needed some time alone, so you told them you would join the crew at the tavern. Grabbing your spear you smiled at the three of them to assure Kassandra of your support. You'd have her back, no matter what. Everything was going to be okay. She smiled back at you and closed her eyes in relief. She must have been anxious about bringing Alexios with her, since the crew knew about the terrible things he had done for the cult. _Well, I'll make sure they'll give him a chance. For Kassandra_, you promised yourself.


	2. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone needs to sort out their thoughts and process the changes in their lives.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for this lame chapter title, but I'm not good at things like that and it was already hard enough to come up with a title for the story itself :D

“Y/N!” The familiar shout helped you spot the crew in the fully crowded tavern. Barnabas was waving. Waving back you made your way through the room. As you were coming closer, Barnabas made some space for you at the table right next to him.

“Come and sit down with us!” Barnabas seemed as happy as always, but his smile didn't reach his eyes. You knew how much he was worried about Kassandra since Brasidas was killed. He loved her as if she was his daughter and seeing her in pain was something that even saddened Barnabas, though usually nothing could cloud his mood.

Sitting down you stole some of Barnabas' food from his plate.

“HEY”, he laughed, but moved his plate towards you. “Did she come back? How is she doing?”, Barnabas lowered his voice.

You took a deep breath. “Yes, she did. I don't know, I think she's fine, but I didn't talk to her. She didn't come alone. She brought Myrrine and Alexios – yes, Alexios – with her.”

“Alexios? Her brother? How is that?” Barnabas was as surprised as you were earlier that day.

“I don't know. As I said, I didn't talk to her. She seemed kind of happy though as well as Myrrine and Alexios looked as if he had cried. He already looked so much different than usual. I guess we should give him a chance.”

“If that's what Kassandra wants us to, I will. And I will make sure the others do, too,” Barnabas responded.

“That is exactly what I thought earlier”, you smiled.

Herodotus, who had listened to your conversation, nodded. Glad to know that you had both, Barnabas and Herodotus, on your side on having Kassandra's back, you started eating. Especially Barnabas had a huge impact on the crew, so you were positive about them accepting Alexios. Still you had some worries at the back of your mind that you didn't want to deal with yet.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Alexios sat in the bunk below deck that Kassandra had showed him and observed his surroundings. It was dark and stifling. So this was his home now? Not what he was used to. There were lots of other bunks. Privacy was something the life on board of a ship didn't offer. But for now, he was alone, the crew was yet to come back from the tavern and Kassandra and mater wanted to give him some time to process the turn his life made. _At least I can rent a room when we dock at other harbors,_ Alexios thought. But he wouldn't step foot on Lakonia again.

He had dinner with Kassandra and mater in their old house in Sparta. It was uncomfortable. Not only could he barely handle the anger which arose when he was reminded of what was done to him long time ago, the pain he felt seeing this house, which could – no, should - have been his home, was too much for him.

Anger was a constant companion of his, which usually helped him cope with the pain, but lately it was different. Since he had met Kassandra at the gathering of the Cult, his pain had changed. It was not longer only about what was done to him, but about what he had lost, what he'd been missing on his whole life. Learning that Kassandra was alive and wanted to bond with him, he had realized there were things he didn't know. Things the Cult didn't tell him, that they tried to keep away from him. He started wondering what else there was he didn't know. Which is why he had given Kassandra a visit at the Athenian prison she was captured at after the battle of Pylos. That she had tried to save his life when that tree had hit him made him question everything Chrysis had told him about his Spartan family. He believed his sister when she said she had also tried to save him back then on Mount Taygetos. Getting to know that she was thrown off that cliff by Nikolaos for that, too, that she had killed him for what he had done to both of his children, made him feel a desire he then noticed had always been there. The desire for a family, a real family to take care of him instead of torturing him; people who'd do everything to prevent him from being hurt instead of putting him in pain. This desire had made him feel in a way that couldn't be dealt with by fighting and killing, which had always helped before.

So he had decided to go to Mount Taygetos on his own without the cult knowing. He hadn't planned on leaving the cult until he saw Kassandra and the woman who turned out to be his mater, Myrrine. Seeing her for the first time was irritating. At first he felt rising anger and a feeling of betrayal because of what she had done to him, but her eyes were filled with pain and love when she looked at him, which made him think. Kassandra was with her, she didn't kill Myrrine like she killed Nikolaos for what happened on Mount Taygetos. This made him realize that maybe Myrrine didn't abandon her children. That she was wronged on that day so many years ago, too, just as he was. By those who claimed to worship him.

He snorted. _Once a demi-god worshiped and feared and now look at me! I'm sitting in the bunk of some dirty old ship, going to share the room with the men and women working here as if I was like them, as if I was nothing._ But didn't Kassandra do so, too? _She's definitely not nothing,_ he knew. She was as strong and mighty as he was, even stronger he had to admit. And she was happy spending her days and nights on this ship with its crew. She considered them worth her time, so maybe it was not them who were nothing, but the cultists he used to surround himself with. They seemed to have treated him like a god, but did they? Hadn't they lied to him his whole life? So had being worshiped not been an illusion they had made him believe to control him? Maybe he had spent his time at fancier places, had lived a glorious life, but was considered nothing but a tool? Maybe he'd been nothing his whole life and now had the chance to actually be someone. To be a person of his own rather than a puppet of people who'd never really cared about him. Maybe this was even worth living on that wreck of a ship.

_But I'll at least need some privacy._ Having a task for now he was able to get rid of the agony that came with his pathetic thoughts. Alexios stood up and stretched which was not easy considering he still wore his golden armor. He didn't plan on taking it off before going to bed though. He didn't feel comfortable enough around here to do so.

Trying to find something he could use to make his bunk a little more private, he took a closer look at the other ones. He could tell which of them were being used and which weren't by the drawers underneath them that were filled with the belongings of the people living there which others weren't. Those not used still had blankets. Alexios took one of them and spread it to see if it was large enough to fit his plan. It was.  
Now he needed some tool to attach the blanket to the wood framing his bunk. He couldn't see any in this room, so he set out for the deck to ask Kassandra for a gavel. It was quiet. He hoped the crew wouldn't have returned by now. He wasn't ready to face them yet. The expression of shock on the woman's face who had waited on deck was mortifying. Alexios wasn't sure if her hiding it made him feel better or worse.

_Y/N. That's her name,_ he thought. Now he knew the name belonging to the face that had looked at him with horror in its eyes when he smilingly killed Perikles or with grief when he killed that Spartan general in Amphipolis. _At least she's the only one who's ever seen me before, who's seen me doing terrible things._ So meeting the others couldn't be much worse he hoped, though he had no illusions and knew they'd probably heard about him and what he had done.

Alexios took a deep breath and stepped outside. Fortunately there was no one there except for Kassandra who laid on the bench behind the helm watching the stars. Ikaros was there with her, cleaning his feathers.  
He was just about to clear his throat to make her aware of his presence, when she spoke. Of course she had noticed his arrival. “Come and sit with me, little brother.” Her voice was soft. Suddenly his palms were sweaty, his heartbeat fastened. He turned to look around if there was anyone approaching the Adrestia. There wasn't.

Worried because of his lack of response, Kassandra moved herself in a sitting position to have a look at him. “Alexios”, she said. “They won't come back too soon, I suppose. I'm sure Y/N told them about you. They will give us some time, as well as they surely need time themselves to adapt to the new situation.” Of course she knew what he was thinking. As she had known earlier that day on Mount Taygetos when he had tried to tell her how sorry and grateful he was. He surely wouldn't have been able to properly express himself, but with Kassandra there was no need to. She already knew and when she had told him so, there had been so much emotion and understanding in her voice that he kind of felt home. Never had anyone talked to him with such a soft voice before.

Alexios nodded and with one last deep breath he took the stairs and sat down next to his sister. Ikaros lifted his head to take a quick look at him before he continued grooming his plumage. At least he seems to accept me.

“Where's mater?”, he asked. Kassandra chuckled. “She went to our place to sleep in a real bed once more. But I promise we will set sail tomorrow morning. No need to stay here any longer.” Alexios noticed a sad tone in her voice that spoke of her own reasons. “You want to leave Lakonia as much as I do”, he realized.

“Yes, I do”, she said quietly.

“And why is that? Why did you come here then?”, Alexios asked.

Kassandra took a deep breath. “We don't need to talk about that right now. You're here, that's all that matters. Home isn't a place, you know.”

“It's the people surrounding you”, Alexios completed her sentence which made Kassandra smile. She leaned her head against his shoulder. Alexios tensed in surprise, but let her stay there. It was an unknown, yet good feeling. He could get used to it.

They sat in silence for a few minutes before Alexios started worrying about the crew's return again. “Will they accept me?” Kassandra lifted her head. “They will have to. If not, they are free to leave.” Alexios furrowed his brow and she took his head in her hands to make him look at her. 

“You are my brother, Alexios, and I will do everything I can to make you feel home.” He swallowed. “Listen, Barnabas and Herodotus will, as well as Y/N and the others who are sailing with me since the beginning of my journey, I'm sure about that. And those are the ones who matter.” There was confidence and determination in her eyes. This helped a lot with his anxiety about meeting the crew.

“Is that why you came on deck? You wanted to talk about meeting the others? I thought you would go to bed since you must be very exhausted.” Alexios just then remembered what he'd been looking for.

“No. I mean, yes, I wanted to sleep, but this bunk. It's not quite private.”

Kassandra laughed. “It's not exactly, what you're used to, is it?”

“It's not”, he smiled. “I wanted to create a curtain with one of the unneeded blankets, but I need a gavel and nails. I wanted to ask you where to find those.”

“Maláka! You wanted to put nails into my ship without asking me first?” 

“I didn't think it would be a problem. It's a wreck anyway”, Alexios' face turned hot. He felt highly uncomfortable, though Kassandra probably meant it in a playful manner. He wasn't used to being called out. It reminded him of how Kleon had told him it wasn't his action to take when he had talked to Kassandra in that Athenian prison.

Kassandra laughed. “It's not, little brother. But I'd still appreciate if you talked to me about things like that before doing anything.” He nodded. Seeing the expression on his slightly red face Kassandra's voice turned soft again. “Hey, it's okay, really. Let's get you the tools you need. Okay?” She stood up and pulled him with her. He shook his head to get rid of the memories of Kleon. He could still feel the wound his arrow caused and that was something he didn't want to think about.

Together they got the gavel and some nails and went below deck to make Alexios' bunk more private.

The task was quickly completed. Satisfied Alexios took a step back to look at their work. The blanket covered the whole bunk. _This will do._

He sensed that Kassandra was watching him and turned around to look at her. He couldn't read her expression. “Do you feel better, now?”, she asked.

“It's better than nothing, I guess.”

“I know it's not much, but the Adrestia is a safe place for us, I promise. You look so tired. I bet you didn't sleep that much on your journey to Mount Taygetos”, she said. Alexios nodded. “I will leave you alone then. Have some rest. You're safe. Good night, Alexios.” With these words she left.

She was right. He was tired, but he was used to that. Not only didn't he sleep much on his journey to Mount Taygetos, he had never slept much. He had never felt safe and – though he would never admit it – he was afraid to go to bed because of his dreams.

He shook his head. He knew he needed at least some sleep, so he started taking off his armor. Under each bunk there was a drawer. He opened his and carefully put his armor inside. Only in his tunic he put the curtain aside and crawled under his blanket.

Though – or maybe because – it was very narrow, he relaxed a bit. It almost felt like a cocoon and he realized that he actually liked it. Recalling the day he fell asleep faster than he had thought he would with the memory of Kassandra calling him _little brother_ in his mind.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hours later you were on your way back to the Adrestia with the crew. Barnabas had told them about their new member and everyone agreed to wait before returning to give the freshly reunited family some time for themselves.

“They took it quite well” You said to Herodotus who was walking silently next to you.

“They all admire Kassandra. And to be honest, they don't know a lot about the cult. Enough to hate them and enough to know who Alexios used to be, but not enough to be resentful towards him”, he responded.  
You nodded. “I hope so.”

You sank into silence again thinking about how to handle the situation. The others may not know enough about Alexios to bear any grudges, but I do. You would always stand by Kassandra and support her in everything she did. You had even hoped for her bringing her brother home, but now that you were confronted with living with him, you weren't sure about being able to forget about Alexios' alter ego.

You recalled the meeting earlier that day. Though he had worn his shiny golden armor, he didn't look like Deimos anymore, you had to admit. Still strong, but not threatening. Didn't you even feel some kind of connection to him when you locked eyes? You couldn't deny that in this moment you completely forgot about what he had done. You were able to see Alexios apart from Deimos. I can do this, you assured yourself.

After everyone had greeted Kassandra and the watch for the night was scheduled you headed towards the sleeping quarters. You then noticed Kassandra didn't follow, but sat down on the edge of the deck. You turned.

“May I sit down?”, you silently asked her.

“Yes, please. I think I need someone to talk to”, Kassandra said gratefully.

She then told you exactly what had happened on Mount Taygetos this day. “I can't believe he's here. He's really here. I'm constantly wondering if I'm dreaming, so I had to pinch myself. It's real.” Kassandra had tears in her eyes. Tears you assumed she had hidden from her brother to not make him feel any worse. Now she gave vent to her feelings. You didn't say anything as you knew she had more to say.

“He went through so much, I just want him to be happy, to feel safe for once in his life. Gods help me, I want to hunt down the cult even more, now, after I've seen him vulnerable. All I see when I look at him is the baby that was thrown off a cliff. All I can think of is how I held him for the first time and was afraid to drop him. I want to protect him so badly. I want to kill those who fucking wronged him, so that he can finally feel safe. It's what he deserves, no matter what terrible things he did. He didn't know any better. He didn't know how to deal with all his pain in a different way. And this is not meant to be an excuse.” Her voice crackled.

“It's okay. I understand. The cult had poisoned his mind from such an early age. Though the things he did are terrible and I have to admit that I am scared, I still do think he can change. With your help. And Myrrine's.”

“Thank you, Y/N. I cannot put into words how much this means to me. I know that Brasidas was not only my friend, but also yours.”

This was exactly why you had been worrying earlier. Thoughts, you weren't able to articulate until now, formed in your mind. “He was”, you slowly said. “But Alexios killed him in battle, just like we killed soldiers in battle. Maybe he was told to do so by Kleon or the Ghost of Kosmos, whoever this is. We know how much the cult manipulated him. But Alexios didn't murder Brasidas, he didn't hate him personally. How many Athenians have we killed and yet Sokrates and Alkibiades still welcome us in Athens. That's how things are. It's war. I don't say I'm happy about it or that it makes Brasidas' death any easier to deal with, but who am I to blame Alexios for things that both of us have done ourselves.” You took a deep breath. You meant every word you said and realizing that made you feel so much better.

“I knew you would say something like that.” 

“Really? Because I didn't”, you laughed. “On my way here I thought about all of this and wasn't sure if I could see Alexios for who he can become and not for what he had done. I've just realized, it could be possible.”

“Still. I knew it. Thank you. Let's go to bed, now. I want to leave early in the morning. Memories of Brasidas' death and Alexios' lost childhood are too present here.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, I hope you liked it!
> 
> I know there's still no real plot, but I thought it was important to focus on the inner thoughts and feelings of the characters for now. I especially enjoyed writing about Alexios' feelings and I hope you liked my characterization so far.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm very insecure about this, but I hope you liked it. Thanks for reading <3
> 
> In my first playthrough my Kassandra spared Nikolaos and though I prefer this ending in the game, for this fic I chose to have him killed because I feel like this way it would be easier for Alexios to believe that Kassandra and Myrrine didn't participate in throwing him off Mount Taygetos.
> 
> It breaks my heart to write about Brasidas' death, but I decided to focus on Alexios (and his relationship with Kassandra and the reader) in this fic, so I didn't change canon here. But I think about writing another story with Brasidas alive some day.


End file.
